TUDAWR8

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Characters: Me, me as well, forest creatures, the wind, the universe.

Setting: The forest floor

I woke up in the woods again. I don’t know really how it happened this time.

I don’t know how it happened the other times either. Every once in a while I’ll just wake up lying on the floor in a random place. Most of the times it’s under my hammock, but sometimes not.

Knot, plus knot, plus knot, plus knot, equals either carpet or hammock, or naught at all.

This time I’m on the ground somewhere surrounded by trees and other small plants, all crowned and lavishly dressed with brightly colored and other not so brightly colored leaves. As I stand up I notice that my rainboots are stuffed to the brim with dead leaves. I think about taking them off for a second but then I decide against it. Taking off my Penguin Suit just to get rid of the dead leaves is too much of an effort at this time in the woods. If I think about them just enough, they’ll start to feel comfortable.

Lying on the forest floor I see myself walking towards me, I’m also wearing a penguin suit but mine is a Shawl Lapel Penguin Suit, and my other self’s is a Peak Lapel one. I’m a classy guy, except for the rainboots, I’m also wearing them. As I walk down the steep side of a hill covered in middle-aged trees, expired foliage, and animal detritus, I decide to meet myself halfway and forget all about the leaves in my boots.

“Look”! I exclaim to my selves crouching on a branch some ten feet away high atop a nearby tree. Me and me as well are staring at me and not at where I’m pointing at. But I have rainboots on my hands and arms, so I can understand my and my self’s confusion. They’re full of dead leaves. Luckily I’m wearing a Double Breasted and I exude authority. I am still staring at me, but me as well is looking around his feet at the ground. I get my message and start to look around my feet as well, wow I look authoritative wearing a Double Breasted PinguSuit.

All three me-amigos start walking to where my boot had pointed at and we end up standing around an old stone well and staring at two quarreling arthropods. There is something there much older than me, myself and me as well. I wish to understand it; I know it is beyond mine understanding. As we pay close attention and let the sounds of the forest take over mine minds I’s begin to understand their conversation, the Grasshopper’s and the Queen Ant’s conversation I mean.

“Wait-t, you mean to tell me-e you are not-tot going to give me-e any of your aphids?” said the hungry Grasshopper.

“I can’t, I shan’t, I just don’t want” replied the Queen Ant.

“But it’s getting-ting colder-older every day, and I’ve been a’singing song-songs for your troops all summer long-long! You can Ant, you shall Ant, you will Ant” countered the hungrier Shopper of Gras.

“Your chant was but a rant, food I will not grant. Food I will not for you want, reward for your idleness I will not grant…” voiced the Ant.

Grasshopper guy stood there dumbfounded for a moment looking around for answers not really noticing any of me. My mouth dropped enthralled by the developing drama, I gulped dry air waiting for the conclusion of their thwarted argument, my hands were sweating with excitement. Maybe it was all those leaves in my boots.

Ant Queen she-dude didn’t even see it coming; tarsus and claw straight to the head. One clean sweep and her head was off. Exoskeleton shmeleton. All three of I and Her entire colony drew in a collective breath of surprise.

A few yards away exactly in our direction, a small gust of air hit me in the face as I lay on the floor daydreaming of Aesop.

The Universe Remains despite my best efforts